Confessions of an Equestrianoholic

September 11. It’s a hard day to get through for our entire country. We all remember where we were when it happened. This day is always a heavy one on my heart. On September 11, 2002 – one year after tragedy hit our country, my father suffered a stroke, the damage done would lead to his passing on September 29. So getting through the month of September is hard for me. Although I’m really good and hiding my emotions when it comes to my father’s passing, this is a first for me, to publicly speak about it. My father’s name was Alfie. Yes, I named my horse after my dad.❤️

I usually try to take this day off from work and spend it doing something my father would’ve enjoyed doing. No, my father didn’t ride horses, but he was an animal lover, and so, what better way to honor my dad but to spend the day with Alfie.

I got to the barn pretty early and spent the morning chit chatting with our barn manager Regina. It was a beautiful day today, sunny, but cool with an delightful breeze. We had decided we were gonna go for a trail ride, so I slowly make my way up to Alfie’s paddock. He sees me coming, I call to him and he comes running to greet me. He bends his head so I can give him a kiss on his nose. I love this horse so damn much.

As Alfie is eating his brunch, I start to groom him. The saddle fitter is coming today, and he needs to be clean. My original plan was to give him a bath, but the saddle fitter texted and said they were going to be arriving earlier than they thought, so no bath today buddy, just a really good grooming. I get him all tacked up and off we go. Regina and Cayman joined us on our ride today, and it was perfect. Alfie is so comfortable on the trail, I even got him to trot on it today.

We come back from our ride, I untack him, and make him some more hydro hay, and brush him again. He’s all ready for the saddle fitter.

For my non horsey friends, let me explain to you what a saddle fitter does. They actually make adjustments to the saddle and/or saddle pad based on the horses body shape. Horses change shape all the time, so adjustments are needed to accommodate their ever changing body. It’s just like humans, if you gain weight, you need bigger pants, if you lose weight, you need smaller ones. A few weeks ago when Alfie started giving me issues with not wanting to move, etc., the first thing I did was check his saddle to see if it was pinching in anyway – it wasn’t, but arrangements were made for the fitter to come out anyway to double check.

When the fitter arrived, she hadn’t seen Alfie in about a year. After she set up her work table and supplies I got Alfie out of his stall and walked him to the grooming stall. Because of COVID, the fitter, her assistant and myself were all wearing masks. As we walked by her she took one look at him and was stunned. She couldn’t believe how muscular he was. Through her mask I could see her mouth was open in shock. She asked what had changed. I told her consistent dressage lessons every weekend at his pace. I explained how I made the decision to keep doing lessons but only at a walk with some light trotting only in straight lines so as to not aggrevate his tendons or feet. I explained all I wanted to do was enjoy him for who he was, and to enjoy riding him for as long as possible.

Again, her mouth dropped open. She told me flat out, what I’m doing is amazing. The weekly lessons are keeping him in such amazing shape and are helping him carry himself well. She commended me for not pushing him beyond his physical ability and for respecting him for who he is. She also said all the body massage work and stretches I do with him are keeping his body in top form. Not bad for a 26 year old horse.

His saddle needed a little bit of adjusting, she said it wasn’t pinching him, but just needed to be a bit more balanced for optimal comfort for not only him, but myself as well.

To hear this professional saddle fitter praising my hard work with Alfie, praising me as a horse owner for accepting his limitations and working with him for the benefit of him, hearing this made me feel so incredibly good.

As horse owners, you have a responsibility to them. You have to make sure all their needs are taken care of. You have to do your research about grain, hay, in Alfie’s case hay alternatives, body massage therapy, finding the best farrier for your horses specific requirements, the list is endless. The most important responsibility – listening to them. Alfie will never be able to comfortably enjoy off property trips. He will never be able to safely canter me around the arena without risking injury. His days of 4 hour trail rides are long gone. But what he still can do, is exactly what we are doing together. I love him for who he is, the fittest senior horse in the barn. ❤️🐴

Alfie is absolutely loving these trail ride excursions we are taking. Today we enjoyed the company of Regina riding Cayman.

Since hitting this little trail with Alfie several weeks ago, I’ve noticed a lot of positive change with Alfie. The biggest is the mounting block. He stands. Like a statue. The last 2 weekends, no adjustments were needed. He stands and I get on. This tells me he is happy with our rides.

So before we head out onto the trail, we have to do our warmup. Alfie starts to balk at this notion, as if we haven’t done this exact same warmup every time we ride lol. He firmly plants his feet into the ground and is like nope I’m not moving. Alfie you are so silly, trying to psych me out so maybe I will just turn you around and head out of the arena onto the trail…HA!

With a little persuasion from my strong legs and a light tap with my stick of influence he realizes that some arena work is necessary to be able to go outside. We work on our circles, and even a bit of trot. At this point Regina and Cayman are in the arena warming up and Alfie instantly has more pep in his step when he sees his buddy.

We head out and Alfie is so excited to be with his buddy, he’s actually got an amazing forward walk. In fact, I had to slow him a bit because his nose was actually up Cayman’s behind!

Today’s ride was different – we led for a bit but we also were able to walk side by side. This is new for us. Side by side riding is something we are used to doing in an arena. Out on the trail, we’ve only done it a handful of times usually because Alfie is slower than most horses, and well, to be honest, I always preferred to follow another horse for safety reasons. So if say there is a deer, whomever is first will see it first which will give me time to react. But when you are side by side, you both are first. Today, I felt confident enough to do that. In fact, at one point, we were walking more forward than Cayman.

Alfie had no problem navigating through the small puddles of water today, and he didn’t even care there were frogs in one of them.

My friend Jenna whom Alfie LOVES accompanies us on our rides to take pictures. Her pictures are so beautiful and so incredibly helpful – I can see where my positioning is great and where it needs work. But I can also see the incredible body of Alfie. He’s using his muscles, he has a top line (muscular back), his booty is big and beautiful – just like a quarter horse is supposed to be. But it’s not flabby, it’s muscle.

All in all it was another perfect horsey weekend spent with wonderful friends and amazing horses.❤️🐴

What an absolutely picture perfect day. The weather was beautiful today, sunny, around 75 and no humidity.

I get to the barn and make the walk up to Alfie’s paddock. As I approach the gate, he picks up his head and sees that it’s me and he comes running over. This has taken over 4 years to achieve. Alfie recognizing me, Alfie eager to see me, Alfie choosing to leave his horsey herd for me. I’ve got to be honest, I never thought we would achieve this kind of love and trust.

I’m not sure what kind of life Alfie had prior to me, but I can assure you it wasn’t filled with love. From his absolutely terrifying reaction to bathing, to him being extremely defensive in his stall, to the numerous scars he has on his legs, I cringe every time my mind goes to that place, how could anyone be mean to him?

Today’s lesson was a first for us. We were going to have our lesson on the trail. It was also going to be the first time Alfie and I would complete an entire trail ride WITHOUT another horse! Several years ago, I was able to get Alfie out on the trail alone for only a handful of steps. It was literally a handful of steps. If you looked behind you, you could clearly see the barn. That took me 45 min to accomplish. I remember when we headed back to the barn how proud of myself I was. Sure, it took 45 min of asking, insisting, encouraging, and downright disagreeing with each other for me to finally get my 10 steps lol. Today was a much easier feat.

As always, my friend Jenna accompanied us to take pictures of our lesson. And my trainer Kari of course was with us. Alfie loves his Aunty Kari and Aunty Jenna so I figured he would have no issue following either one of them as we headed away from the barn. But my boy was not completely sure of himself with following them. Would they lead him into the scary swamp, or to the scary hunting shed those were some of the thoughts I’m sure were going through his head lol. But have no fear Alfie, I’m here, I’ve got your back always and I’m telling you it’s ok to walk. And he did.

As we passed the scary hunting shack which isn’t scary to Alfie anymore, Alfie let out a big exhale, he wasn’t nervous anymore being out on the trail alone. I successfully gained his trust. We made it to the end of the trail and headed back.

We worked on my half seat, leg yielding, haunches and shoulder exercises, all while out in the great outdoors. It was truly a different lesson for us, but Alfie really enjoyed it.

As my sweet boy eats his dinner, all I can do is smile with my heart so full of love for him. Yes, he is a challenge. Yes, he plays with my emotions to get out of doing things, and yes he’s got his fair share of mental and physical scars, but he’s mine and I am thankful everyday that the universe brought us together.❤️🐴

Today’s weather – cooler than it’s been with very low humidity. It was an absolutely perfect weather day for riding.

I get to the barn and my friend and fellow boarder Monika wants to come on our trail ride today. Monika is the owner of Texas, a beautiful older quarter horse who happens to be Alfie’s best horsey friend. Literally, the 2 are joined at the hip. Texas is not obsessed with Alfie, Alfie is obsessed with Texas. It’s actually a very sweet friendship they seem to share.

As I’m walking Alfie in from his field, I notice he has a spring in his step. He is moving beautifully. Yesterday after Alfie’s challenging ride with my trainer, I spoke with our barn manager Regina who agreed that the humidity was too much for him and that his arthritis was having a bad day. I asked her if she could ride him for me to see if she felt anything about him that was off or not right. She’s never ridden him before and was happy to oblige.

I get him all tacked up and Regina gets on him. I immediately can see that Alfie is much less stiff in his movements. He was forward, responded to Regina’s leg and seemed more willing to move today. She gets off and I get on, and he is much better than yesterday. I was able to get him to do some circle exercises in both directions which he did well with. He still seemed a little stiff in spots but overall he was better.

While I finish my warm up, Monika is finished warming up Texas. Regina and Jenna are our designated pedestrians, this is Texas’s first time on the trail. 😊

As we make our way towards the trail, Texas is both curious and intrigued at the sites. We walk past some rock piles, our manure pit, and he is just enjoying taking in the sites. We walk through the gate and we are on the trail.

As we approach the first bend, we alert Monika that the super scary hunting shack is right around the corner. But have no fear Texas, Alfie’s got your back. As we approach the shack, Texas stops to look and, like Alfie, wasn’t sure what it was. But Alfie is an old pro at this shack and we walk past it with Texas following Alfie.

As we approach the end of the trail, we turn around and head back. Alfie is completely in his element out here. I was also more relaxed on this ride.

Leaving the safety of the arena has always been hard for me. The unknown trail, today we saw a deer and several frogs in the puddles, it’s these unknowns that scare me. Unless there is some sort of zombie apocalypse happening, no deer is going to be entering the arena.

Over the years people have told me I need to relax more when I’m riding. It was suggested to me I smoke marijuana, or take a shot of vodka before I ride. I’ve never smoked marijuana in my life and a shot of vodka would probably make me super sick, since I’m not much of a drinker. I completely understood though where the suggestions were coming from and why it was so vital for me to not be nervous. If I’m nervous, the horse is going to be nervous.

Logically, yeah, I get that. Getting my emotions to match up with that logic, ha, not so easy. But I’m really lucky that Alfie is so incredibly tolerant of my nerves, and he goes out of his way to protect me.

Despite having these nerves, I’ve overcome them enough to accomplish many trail rides with him in addition to interesting off property events such as cow sorting and obstacle courses. The first time we sorted cows, I had just gotten an Apple Watch and it’s got a built in heart rate monitor. It went off 52 times during the 3 hour clinic because my heart rate was so elevated…but I did it anyway. Alfie had a blast with the cows. So whenever I start to get down about being nervous with things, I just remind myself it’s ok to be nervous – but I’m not giving in to it because I’m overcoming it enough to do these exciting things. And at the end of the day, that’s really all that matters.

On our way back to the barn, I got a brilliant idea. Next week, weather permitting, my lesson is going to be outside on the trail. I spoke with my trainer Kari, and she thought it was a great idea. We can practice our leg yielding, our shoulder and haunches exercises, trotting, all while outside, in the “unknown.” It will give Alfie and I a complete change of scenery, and some new challenges to overcome. ❤️🐴